you think getting a job as a secretary is easy? also secretaries are learned fellows

That is very odd, in my opinion. Being a housewife is a noble calling and yes, it is work. Taking care of children and the house is work.

My dear work if you can because it's really much better you spends your own money.

Your father, however, well-meaning he may be, has crossed a line. Your career choice, growing healthy and responsible next- generation citizens, is a... high calling and respectfully, none of his business. You have no obligation to prop up his self-esteem. If you, your husband and your kids are happy with your current division of labor and lifestyle, that's what matters.. .no backseat driving from dad required.  more

First and foremost you may be your father’s daughter but you are no longer his child. You’re a woman with a husband and children and your primary... allegiance, concerns and decisions are with them. This is not disrespect to your father it a reality of adulthood.
There is dignity is housework and child rearing. Do not let your father’s opinions rob you of that. However, life does throw curve balls. Were something to happen to your husband, how would you proceed. Do you have marketable skills to be able to get a job and support your children? Are there 529 accounts that would allow your children to go to college if your husband were not around? Could you get part time work at home work, like medical billing, when the kids are in school? Awful thought but if you had to divorce, how would you support yourself?
I would worry less about Dad’s opinion. Be proud of your choices, AND plan for what if’s. more

He’s probably worried about your future security! Many women that’s are HW end up getting the shorter end of the deal if things don’t work out. I hope... you do have a means to make your own money.  more

That is how father's are. They would like to be proud of their daughters. However what you can do is to add a private business to the family you have... and raise some for your self for a kind of rescue plan. What if one day your husband's resource envelope breaks? But also he wants you to have some money on you such that when he comes by he can explain to you and you find reason to fund . Nothing else. more

Am looking at it from both worlds.I think your dad and most parents would feel the same especially if you are educated and all.He is scared somewhat... if something happens not necessarily divorce if you can take care of the children.I would advise you look into working from home if skilled and what you can do that can bring in extra income.This can go into savings and the likes.Get into book clubs and such like meetings once a while and be out there while staying at home.I do believe,you can achieve so much while being at home that will go beyond what you imagined.All the best and may your relationship with your dad become better  more

You are absolutely right that taking care of your household, your husband and two children is a full time "unpaid" job. It is the "housewife"... description that gives this job a bad name. Perhaps "a homemaker" or "family manager" would be much better sounding terms. Your dad just doesn't know. My daughter has a college degree yet she stays home as a family manager and I am 100% proud of her.  more

Tell your dad. That he doesn't have to say anything about your business. That will save him the embarrassment.

Sorry to say, your dad is a fool. The most important of all roles is that of mother. Children need their mum 24/7 and dads cannot emulate that. Tell... your dad this: Having surveyed more than 5000 young people world-wide, easily the most stable, intelligent, articulate, and insightful women were Swiss. Yet Swiss kids do not go to school until age 7, it being considered more important to be nurtured by their mums. Yet Swiss women never got the vote until 1972. Tell your dad he is too easily influenced by idealogues that do not have our fulfilment as a priority. Actually the opposite is the case, with deparenting being the objective. Your dad is sadly brainwashed. more

You’re doing vital, skilled work every single day. Raising the next generation to be happy and productive people is, in fact, the most critical and... complex job there is. Remind your dad of that truth.

Let your dad know that you are aware he wants the best for you, but that he clearly does not appreciate what it takes to be a good mother and wife. Running a home, raising the kids, and being a loving and supportive wife is a full-time, heart-and-soul career. It takes early mornings, late nights, negotiation, budgeting, teaching—and every bit of you—and you find it very fulfilling.

Outline for him a typical day of planning and cooking meals, cleaning, juggling the kids’ schedules, checking that schoolwork is completed, and keeping track of the family finances, etc. Help him understand that you are present with your children, sharing their laughter and triumphs, encouraging them in their challenges, and comforting them in their tears. You are not “just a housewife” but the architect of your family’s daily life.

Above all, stand firm in your value. You’re not shirking ambition—you’re channeling it differently.
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Him being ashamed is a little bit extreme. He may have had other dreams for you based on how he provided for you. That was also supposed to be a part... of the fatherly interview with your choice of mates. I was still talk with him and find out and then come up with a plan to adjust somewhat. He is most likely concerned that if things still breakpoint that you are stable. If you haven't already come up with a plan with your significant other this may be the time to come up with that plan so that you can show him, such as splitting your assets or a fund set aside for you and offspring. You may also want to consider how you would continue to find your lifestyle if something happened such as a work from home job. I'm a financial advisor so he doesn't sound too far off track to me. more

As a father, I understand my daughters better than anyone, when are in good mood, we share jokes here and there and Im always particular when it comes... to family; Family is not a bout provision or what you do for them, its about how you make them feel. If I were you, I will listen to your father's advice. more

Your Dad is right. Sit down with your Man. Have a vivid discussion; this time round, the family first.
“You appreciate his support to the Family for... solely carrying the load. This time, you want to support him by doing some mini job. Example: a Mini Mart or Day Care related but don’t mention Makeup’s and the likes.
Find a good school of your two children. You can blend that with your work and you will see it working for you. more

Is he gonna pay for a baby sitter? I love that my wife stays home with the kids rather than my in laws or my parents raise them. I come home and am... fully informed what they’ve done all day, they were fed, played with and taken care of. You are very valuable to the working man. Keep up the good work  more

I can ABSOLUTELY relate! I was a PhD student when I met my husband, got married, and then started a family. My father was not ashamed of me being a... SAHM, but he didn't understand the value and would convince me to get a job outside of the home. However, by FAR this was the BEST decision for me and my family and even my Dad can see it years later. As others mentioned, you and your husband have to do what's best for your household. It's not your responsibility to convince your father of the decisions that you and your husband have agreed upon. Again, it can be a struggle when family, etc, do not respect the work that women who choose to stay at home provide for their families and the investment in their family's future, but stay the course because there is no replacement for having a loving, dedicated parent at home. Now that my kids are older, I'm transitioning to working outside of the home and fortunately, many companies recognize that SAHM skills are transferable & valuable! more

Just make sure you have life insurance on your husband and continue to raise healthy happy kids.

You shouldn't have to do more than one job. You are right, instead have him hire a cleaning lady/nanny, personal errand service and a cook. He can... save himself from embarrassment by affording you those luxuries. more

I wonder if this is jidt embarrassment on your dad’s part or fear for your future? Does he dislike or mistrust your husband?